NVC Assumptions and Intentions
NVC Quick Connect
August Newsletter 2017
Sent Monday, August 7, 2017
What You'll Find in This Month's Newsletter:

  • NVC Assumptions and Intentions, by Inbal Kashtan and Miki Kashtan
  • Safeguard Your Child Better Than Your School's Anti-Bullying Program, by Tim Dawes of The Parenthood Project
  • Lean More About Marshall Rosenberg
  • Apologizing and Forgiveness, by Alan Seid

  • Nonviolent Communication by Marshall Rosenberg - Part One
  • NVC Big Dream
Quotes by Marshall Rosenberg, Dalai Lama and Mohandas Ghandi

Other Good Stuff
  • Compassion in Action
  • Almost NVC Cartoon
  • Self-Righteous Anger, by Mary Mackenzie (from her book Peaceful Living)

Additional NVC Audio Resources
  • Spread the Love, by Kenny Chesney

NVC Facebook and Yahoo! Groups

August Book Specials
Four book package specials from PuddleDancer Press

Scroll down to see all...
"Human beings have enormous power to enrich life. We can use words to contribute to people’s enjoyment, their wisdom. We can use words that can make life miserable for people. So our words are very powerful. We can touch people in ways that give great pleasure, great nurturing, support. We are powerhouses, and there’s nothing we enjoy doing more than to use that power we have to enrich lives. So isn’t it wonderful that we have this power and the joy it brings when we use it? That’s to be celebrated. Wow! And the more we celebrate that, the less we will be willing to do anything else."
~Marshall Rosenberg
Featured Article
Key Assumptions and Intentions of NVC
© 2006 Inbal Kashtan and Miki Kashtan • nvc@baynvc.org • www.baynvc.org • 510-433-0700 Please include copyright and contact information and check with us before passing on to anyone.

Following are key assumptions that NVC practice is based on. Many traditions share these assumptions; NVC gives us concrete, powerful tools for putting them into practice. When we live based on these assumptions, self-connection and connection with others become increasingly possible and easy.

1. All human beings share the same needs: We all have the same needs, although the strategies we use to meet these needs may differ. Conflict occurs at the level of strategies, not at the level of needs.

2. Our world offers sufficient resources for meeting everyone’s basic needs: The scarcity experienced by so many people arises because we have not designed our social structures to meet everyone’s needs. We can attribute any apparent scarcity to a current systemic limitation, a crisis of imagination, or a lack of skills for fostering connection.

3. All actions are attempts to meet needs: Our desire to meet needs, whether conscious or unconscious, underlies every action we take. We only resort to violence or other actions that do not meet our own or others’ needs when we do not recognize more effective strategies for meeting needs.

Read More
"Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony."
~Mohandas Ghandi
Article #2
Safeguard Your Child Better Than Your School's Anti-Bullying Program
by Tim Dawes
Tim Dawes is a father of two. After writing an award-winning book on forming connections fast and rapidly resolving conflict, Tim wanted to create a site where he could help people build healthy and happy families that are good to each other. www.ParenthoodProject.com

These days news about bullying and the anti-bullying programs designed to stop it seem impossible to avoid.

But is your school’s anti-bullying program really the place to turn to protect your kids? Let’s run down what we know.

1) School is the Safest Place for Your Child Yes, violence waxes and wanes at schools. But by and large, kids are safe at school. Experts will tell you that violent crime in schools has fallen off significantly since the 1990s.

Here’s an assessment from Stephen Brock of California State University, Sacramento:

Not only are rates of school violence going steadily down, but it’s clear that schools are the safest place for a student to be.

Brock is a leading expert on school violence and the author of several books on the subject. And the research backs him up.
Read More ...
"My religion is very simple. My religion is kindness."
~Mohandas Ghandi
Article #3
Learn More About Marshall Rosenberg
Source: Wikipedia
Marshall Rosenberg (October 6, 1934 – February 7, 2015) was an American psychologist, mediator, author and teacher. Starting in the early 1960s he developed Nonviolent Communication, a process for supporting partnership and resolving conflict within people, in relationships, and in society. He worked worldwide as a peacemaker and founded the Center for Nonviolent Communication,[1] an international non-profit organization [2] for which he served as Director of Educational Services.

According to his biographer, Marjorie C. Witty, "He has a fierce face-- even when he smiles and laughs. The overall impression I received was of intellectual and emotional intensity. He possesses a charismatic presence."
Read More ...
Love is my religion.
~Ziggy Marley
Article #4
Apologizing and Forgiveness: Deciphering the Quandary 
by Alan Seid
Alan Seid grew up bilingual, bicultural in Mexico City, Mexico. At 16 Alan decided to be part of the solution rather than problem, and to learn whatever Alan needed to learn to live that. At 18, Alan realized that my life needed to be about service and contribution, and that that would probably look different than traditional employment. At 21 Alan began following the steps in the Financial Integrity Program detailed in Your Money or Your Life by Vicki Robin & Joe Dominguez, which taught him how to be very clear with money. By 27 he had enough savings to -while living simply- embark on a seven-year self-directed period of intensive research and learning.
Sometimes when someone apologizes to us, it’s hard to take it in. It’s hard to accept the apology and forgive. Other times when we want to apologize, and know that it would be a good thing to do, we resist it. We know our actions stimulated pain in someone else, and yet we don’t think we did something wrong. With the possibility of guilt and shame added to the mix, the thought of apologizing is painful. In cases like these, how do we reach reconciliation?

The answer to this conundrum boils down to two kinds of apologies:
1) Guilt-and-shame based: “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have spoken to you that way. I was wrong [and deserve to be hated by you]” (or some variation based on wrongness and punishment).

2) Sincere mourning: “I feel sadness and disappointment thinking about how I spoke to you. It didn’t meet my own needs for consideration and respect and I can see that it stimulated a lot of pain for you. I’m sorry.”
Read More ...
"Nobody can hurt me without my permission."
~Mohandas Gandhi
Audio #1
Nonviolent Communication by Marshall Rosenberg
Part One
We will share parts two and three in upcoming newsletters. ​​​​​​​
Audio #2
NVC Big Dream

Watch Here ...
Additional NVC Audio Resources
  • Spread the Love (by Kenny Chesney) A song that I believes embodies NVC. Please listen beyond the opening copy to hear Kenny sing. ​​​​​​​
Other Good Stuff
Compassion in Action
Marine's son, 4, bursts into tears as dad, stepmom wed
​​​​​​​

Self-Righteous Anger, by Mary Mackenzie
Hating people is like burning down your house to get rid of a rat. – Harry Emerson Fosdick

Self-Righteous Anger

Have you ever noticed that some of your behaviors ensure that your needs for peace and relief won’t be met?
Read More
August Specials
Special #1
NVC Educator Package​​​​​​​
by Various Authors - 4-Title Package

Educators, administrators, homeschoolers, and anyone who works with children will find powerful skills to create an emotionally safe environment where academic excellence thrives. Build trust, improve cooperation, and maximize each student's potential. 

This package contains the following titles: 
  • The Compassionate Classroom        
  • Life-Enriching Education       
  • The No-Fault Classroom        
  • Teaching Children Compassionately   

Read More
Retail Price: $55.80
Our List Price: $39.00
Book: $15
​​​​​​​eBook: $13.00
Special #2​​​​​​​​​​​​​​
NVC Parenting Package
by Various Authors - 3-Title Package

Transform family conflicts and sibling rivalry, move beyond power struggles to cooperation and trust, effectively motivate children, and create a quality of connection with your children that embodies unconditional love.

This package contains the following titles: ​​​​​​​
  • Respectful Parents, Respectful Kids
  • Parenting From Your Heart
  • Raising Children Compassionately​​​​​​​
Read More
Retail Price: $33.85
List Price: $23.00
Book: $11
eBook: $9
Special #3
NVC Social Change Package
by Various Authors - 3-Title Package

Peace activists and social change agents will find a thorough intro to the process and consciousness of social change. Learn to transform enemy images and develop empathy to make the greatest strides in your social change efforts.

This package contains the following titles: ​​​​​​​
  • Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life 3rd Ed.
  • Speak Peace in a World of Conflict
  • The Heart of Social Change

Read More
Retail Price: $42.85
List Price: $29.00
Book: $13.00
eBook: $11.00
Special #4
NVC Workplace Communication Package ​​​
by Various Authors - 4-Title Package


Build morale, strengthen teams, resolve power struggles, satisfy irate customers or staff. This comprehensive workplace communication toolkit an intro to

Empathy in the workplace matched with practical NVC skill building for real world success.

This package contains the following titles: 

  • The Empathy Factor
  • Words That Work in Business
  • Humanizing Health Care
  • We Can Work It Out
Read More
Retail Price: $50.80
List Price: $35.00
Book: $15
eBook: $13.00
© Sven Hartenstein.(used with permission)
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PuddleDancer Press