Gandhian Principles... continued
"Just as one must learn the art of killing in the training for violence, so one must learn the art of dying in the training for non-violence. Violence does not mean emancipation from fear, but discovering the means of combating the cause of fear. Non-violence, on the other hand, has no cause for fear… He who has not overcome all fear cannot practice ahimsa." ( All Men Are Brothers , p. 104)
"I must obey, even at the cost of my life, the law of love." ( Golden Treasury of Wisdom , p. 34)
"He/she should not do that which he/she knows to be wrong, and suffer the consequence whatever it may be, this is the key to the use of soul-force." ( Hind Swaraj , p. 69).
When we look deeper, we see that it is our internal response to the consequences, namely our fear, which stops us from acting on our full truth at all times. I doubt that Gandhi meant to imply that one would have to feel no fear. I rather believe the focus is on the willingness to overcome the fear.
What fuels courage, if we read Gandhi's quotes carefully, is the conviction of truth and integrity, coupled with the abiding trust in love's power. The intensity of love and commitment serves as a form of fire that burns through the perceived danger. This love is not dependent on the behavior of other people. This love continues even in the extreme of enduring violence against self.
Fear itself doesn't go away as the practice of nonviolence deepens. What changes is the ability to bear it and still choose love and courage. With enough practice and commitment, acting based on fear becomes less and less of a draw.
Indeed, Gandhi, who ceaselessly attempted to live the principles of his teaching, time and again walked directly into potential harm's way to carry out his plans. During the civil war that broke out towards the end of the independence campaign between Hindus and Muslims, for example, Gandhi (in his 70s) walked through the most dangerous and violent zones (Bihar state and Noakhali) to "live the truth he went to teach" ( Gandhi the Man , p. 90).
"It is not at all impossible that we may have to endure every hardship that we can imagine, and wisdom lies in pledging ourselves on the understanding that we shall have to suffer all that and worse." ( Gandhi the Man , p. 99)
The practice of NVC applies the principles of nonviolence primarily to relationships and to dialogue. Most people who practice NVC rarely apply it in circumstances where danger to life may be present, although increasing numbers do so successfully. Whether or not physical danger is present, practicing NVC invites us to profound emotional vulnerability. It is our emotional self that might be "injured" or "die" as we open ourselves to truth and love in our interactions with ourselves and other humans.
For many, these interactions become a stimulus for intense fear that is experienced as a threat to survival. For example, in the context of everyday living, when someone judges us harshly, the threat to our physical survival is highly unlikely. And yet we often rally to defend ourselves as if our survival were at stake. It takes a great deal of practice to remain open and calm and even loving and curious in the face of criticism, blame, or judgment. This practice is what prepares us for the kind of uncompromising love that nonviolence expresses.
At the same time, the practice of opening up to whatever comes our way has an unexpected benefit. As we engage with it, we learn that in fact our emotional self is not in any danger. Our soul, our human essence, the truth of who we are, are regularly strengthened by stretching into this vulnerability.
The next segment of this 7-part series explores the 3rd principle that NVC shares with Ghandian nonviolence: the commitment to seeing the humanity of other people no matter what they do to us or others. This part includes a practice of transforming enemy images to enhance the willingness and capacity to see humanity by relating actions to shared human needs.
The complete bibliography for the series can be found online at NVC Gandhian Principles Bibliography.
Miki Kashtan is a co-founder of Bay Area Nonviolent Communication. She leads workshops and intensive retreats in Nonviolent Communication throughout the United States and in Japan, Europe, Brazil, and Africa, and offers mediation, meeting facilitation, coaching, and training for organizations. Miki hosts the Conflict Hotline, a monthly live call-in TV show, and blogs regularly at The Fearless Heart. She holds a Ph.D. in Sociology from UC Berkeley and her articles have appeared in Tikkun magazine and elsewhere.
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